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It takes more than just time

Photo courtesy of Jill Wellington from Pexels

As part of my training for an (eventual) career change I attended the first class of a program centered on rebuilding your life after separation. The instructor, Diane Valiquette, has decades of experience helping people with separation, divorce and rebuilding their lives - she’s wonderful to work with.

My mindset was that “I’m here as an observer”... I’ve already dealt with “my stuff”.

The class included men and women from different situations who are all at different stages in their own journey. There was even one couple there whose intention is to strengthen their relationship (Kudos to them!).

We all know that when you plan your life around a relationship or another person that often becomes your identity – or at least, an identity you’re trying to live in to. Naturally, if that relationship falls apart, so do you. It’s a feeling of being totally lost, blind-sided, confused, scared... I never fully understood until I was walking through it.

I’ve been separated since my son was born. He was barely 2 days old when my husband left and I became a single mother.

Photo courtesy of Daria Obymaha, Pexels

This was a major life transition that I wasn’t prepared for. It’s taken a lot of work to get to where I am today. And still, the first class with Diane threw me a curveball by giving me new insight into myself, my choices and ultimately into the closure I thought I already had.

If you’re going through separation, struggling in your relationship or just want to understand how to strengthen yourself as a person, consider a program like this. Life is too short to spend your time struggling alone.

One thing I’ve learned through my own journey is that it’s not simply “time” that heals – it’s the work. The right work.

Wishing you all the best xo

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